Less than 4 weeks remains till my trip to China which includes Mongolia, with a possible India trip right after. A conversation tonight has led that trip further east to Europe for a tour d’cappriccio. I might literally fly around the world. Kind of a big thought with all that is in front of me; bills 4 times more than I actually have in my account, the list could go on but in my mind it stops with bills. How will I capture audio?
Last week I had the shoot that i am most proud of in my life for the New York Times. It was a three day shoot on the pro life movement starting with a protest in front of a planned parenthood. Think what you may about those people who stand out on corners with graphic images of aborted babies, I now have an appreciation for what they do and the strong convictions they live by.
Every time I turn in photographic work (especially to the ny times even after 24 shoots) i feel like I am in a situation where I just said I love you for the first time to a pretty girl. I wait for her rejection and when it doesn’t come (in the form of an editors negative critiques) a huge step is taken in the direction of confidence. Not confidence in who I am as a photographer but in the natural feelings I have to photograph what I think I should when I am in photographic situations. “You did fantastic work” is what my editor said. I praise the Lord for this. The Wall Street Journal editor used “Superb” instead. So it is a great week.
I want most of you to know, that my life is amazing because of Jesus. That might go over your head or you might just want to discount it. But everything I have is from him. I trust him and I believe he trusts me and loves me and is equipping me to do his work.
With all the great in my life, I trust God, with all the “bad” in my life, I trust God. Bad just means it isn’t going as I planned but is humbling me into a mentality of acknowledging a need for a savior. There is a lot in my life that is not going as planned. Most of it in fact. I am sad to say that a friend I have had a brother in similar circumstances who was going through a tough time in his life. Lost his house, his wife divorced him and he chose to end his life. I am now praying more than ever for all who read this to understand that God gives you purpose because he has purpose for you. God has work for you. That is why you are still breathing.
I laid out all my gear to inventory it, I need to be purchasing a few pieces soon. Had a couple come check out my house midday today. They might rent my place. I have no plans to go anywhere. This all means something.. And my life goes on.
You can live in optimism with reality around the corner, and continue in your dream. If you dream in pessimism and reality and neither can pay rent, it is now that acknowledging that God was there they whole time will make you feel like a fool.